Family Issues in Japan

It's hard to believe, but family issues are really taking center stage in Japan these days. Japanese men have are finally owning up to the problems they face. Here is a sample from a recent news article:

In the corner of a small Japanese restaurant, a dozen dark-suited businessmen gathered at a large table. Smoke hovered over the dinner and beer disappeared as quickly as it was poured. At first glance, it looked like a typical Friday night post-work scene played out all over Tokyo’s taverns. But then your eye stops on a poster-sized sign propped up next to one of the middle-aged men. It reads:

Three Golden Rules of Love:
* Thank you (say it without hesitation)
* I am sorry (say it without fear)
* I love you (say it without embarrassment)

All the men at the table stood up. Equally spaced out and still wearing their stiff black suits, they chanted in unison: "I can’t win! I won’t win! I don’t want to win!" The chant was followed by a deep bow, a straightening of the backs, big smiles and a burst of applause. The meeting of the "National Chauvinistic Husbands Association" was under way.

If you're confused at this point, don't fret. The group is called the National Chauvinistic Husbands Association because it's a club for bossy husbands who need help (a little lost in translation effect here.)

So the title is appropriate for this group of men. In an abrupt about face from traditional Japanese relationships, the men are learning how to give their wives more respect.

More poster signs surrounded the men at this meeting:

Three Golden Rules of Renewing Family:
* Let's Listen
* Let's Write
* Let's Talk

And there's even a system of ranking your husbandry in the club:

Rank 1: Love your wife after three years of marriage
Rank 2: Help with the household work
Rank 3: No extramarital affairs or at least she doesn't know about it
Rank 4: Ladies first
Rank 5: Hold hands with your wife in public
Rank 6: Listen to what your wife has to say carefully and seriously
Rank 7: Solve issues between your wife and your mother
Rank 8: Say thank you without hesitation
Rank 9: Say I'm sorry without fear
Rank 10: Say I love you without embarrassment

After the meeting, we followed a young man named Yohei Takayama home. He'd just been promoted to "Rank 4." He admitted that "Rank 5," holding hands with his wife in public, was not going to be natural or easy. He and his wife have been married for two years. His wife said he’s been a member of the club for a year and a half and it has changed their relationship dramatically.

Namely, she said, he helps more around the house, listens to her more, and understands she also has a career that exhausts her. What they’re growing into, she said, is a partnership. They went grocery shopping, and I noticed he carried the bags and helped her decide what to buy. As they left the store to go home, he took her hand in his. It didn't look like the most natural thing in the world for him, but he was trying. His wife smiled as they walked home.

Lost Japanese Parrot Knew His Address

When Yosuke, a parrot, flew out of his cage and got lost, the little guy did exactly what he had been taught -- recites his name and address to a stranger willing to help. Police rescued the African Gray parrot from a neighbor's roof in the city of Nagareyama, near Tokyo.

After spending a night at the station, he was transferred to a nearby veterinary clinic, while police searched for clues. “I tried to be friendly and talked to him, but he completely ignored me,” policeman Mr. Uemura said. The parrot kept mum with the cops, but began chatting with the veterinarian. “I'm Mr. Yosuke Nakamura,” the bird told the vet. He also provided his full home address, down to the street number, and even entertained the clinic staff by singing songs. “We checked the address, and what do you know, the Nakamura family really lived there. When we told them we had found Yosuke, they were elated,” Mr. Uemura said.

The Nakamura family had been teaching the bird its name and address for about two years, and they were very happy that it finally paid off!
Source: Internet News, 2008-05-26

Just like that parrot, and just like sheep we have all gone our own way and completely went off course! All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way. (Isaiah 53:6). To us who are more intelligent than parrots and sheep, God has explained how we can find our way back to Him! You will find Him if you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul (Deut. 4:29).

Bathing Your Way to Purity

Much of the way that Japanese religion merges with everyday life in Japan is in areas of physical cleanliness. The relationship between the gods and man in the Japanese worldview comes down to the matter of personal purity. If one is to be on good terms with the gods, it is believed that one must avoid things which would cause physical pollution. If it occurs by some accidental way, it must be taken away. And one great method for doing so is the most obvious one: a good hot bath. Japan is blessed by many mountains, and consequently many hot springs.

One can see here how the Bible speaks to this matter of cleanliness before the God who has made us and loves us. The cleansing God offers has nothing to do with a physical bath. In fact, it is quite useless for a right relationship with our Lord. "Although you wash yourself with soda and use an abundance of soap, the stain of your guilt is still before me" (Jer 2:22). God is into the deep cleansing that man needs, begins at the heart polluted with sin, and uses the agent of the Holy Spirit. "He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit."

Having said that, our family does enjoy a good hot spring bath from time to time for the simple recreation of it. Here's a photo of us last week going to the famous Mt. Zao hot spring. It's an outdoor sulphur spring that leaves one with an unmistakeable smell. Rather ironic that bathing leaves one smelling.